
Did you know that you can journey from and out of your pain and turn it into your purpose?
Did you know that your pain can be the message that you have for the world?
Those experiences, mistakes, situations, tests and trials can all be turned around and used to learn from. You can use these experiences for good, for God’s glory and to help and encourage others too.
My story is an example of this. The pain and suffering, the sickness; both physical and mental and the situations and experiences that I endured have now been turned around for good, according to God’s will, for His glory and to lift other people up.
“For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.”
Jeremiah 29:11
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The Beginning of Pain
At 14, I began fainting; I would blackout, sometimes two to four times a week or two or more times a day, and it was like that for 24 years. It would come and go in seasons of months and years, occasionally easing enough for me to have a bit of a life.
Though there was never enough time in between in order to drive, but, at the age of 34, I was finally able to take lessons, pass my test and buy my first car.
Everything was finally falling into place, my kids were happy, I was enjoying my job and now I was driving!
My walk with God over the years became better and better, He was my friend, my guide, my companion as well as my savior.
In the difficult times He was my comforter and in the good times He was there with me too.
I was studying mental health as part of my degree. Then during prayers one day God had put on my heart to write a book to help Christians improve their health and wellbeing. Over the next year and a half I began making notes as and when He prompted me.
In March 2019, it happened again.
I had such a bad episode, I ended up spending a week in the cardiology ward. I was told by doctors and the DVLA not to drive. I had even more tests done and then the cardiologist finally gave the diagnosis; Neurocardiogenic Syncope (low blood pressure, bradycardia aka slow heart rate, and occasionally irregular heart rate and the signals from there to the brain being slow).
But the words he said to me stuck, “There is no cure or treatment for it.” That was the start of my depression again.
I was stuck indoors, not being able to get out because of the syncope.
My daughter was amazing, she helped me whenever I had episodes and even did the housework, bless her!
I couldn’t help my daughter and I couldn’t do things I believed a mum should be able to do, I missed driving them to school, parents’ evenings, I hated it!
I went into what I called a pit. It was a dark time and was even self- harming. Looking back, I realized it was something I could be in control of, as everything else was totally out of my control, and it was the only thing that gave that sense of control back to me.
Though I was so ashamed of it and I hid it well. I withdrew from family and friends, I wanted to be on my own and yet I felt so alone.
Can you relate to these thoughts, beliefs or feelings? Perhaps you feel as though you are stuck in a situation and can’t get out?
“Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is – his good, pleasing, and perfect will.”
Romans 12:2
First Steps From Pain to Purpose: Submission + Relationship
We need to submit. We can do this by giving to God every area of our lives, not just specific areas but all of it. This can be done through prayer and simply talking to Him. He can see our situation and He knows how we are feeling but He wants us to talk to Him.
One day, I was fed up with feeling the way I was, I was ready to accept my pain and difficulties and I wanted to be released from it. I literally cried out to God, bawling my eyes out, I asked Him to release me and relieve me from that darkness.
When we submit we are giving Him everything and building a relationship with Him. He wants a relationship with us. The key to any relationship is communication.
So speak to Him, tell him your cares, let Him in and also listen to what He is saying in return too. We need to give up control (or wanting to be in control!) and our weaknesses and give them all to Him, letting them go.
“Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you.”
1 Peter 5:7
Another way to build or rebuild a relationship is by getting to know the other person, the same goes for God, we need to get to know Him too.
How?
By reading the word of God, the Holy Bible. I began by reading devotionals. It was the gentler and simpler way back in, for me.
As I did, I gradually wanted to know Him more and I began spending time reading the word of God and then worshipping Him more too.
Being thankful, giving Him thanks is also an important part in the journey. By doing this we are turning our attention off of the negatives or ourselves and onto what is good.
I challenge you to think of 3 things you are grateful for right now.
Then do this everyday, thinking of what you are thankful for. Even if it is the sun shining or birds singing, or the nature around us. There is always something we can see, appreciate and thank God for.
“Give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.”
1 Thessalonians 5:8
Stepping into Your Purpose
From rebuilding this relationship with Him and resubmitting the Lord’s plan began to come to light.
It began by Him asking me to start writing, blogging to be precise. I argued with Him, as I didn’t think I was ready, but it was His timing, not mine.
I began blogging and sharing my journey with the intention to encourage and reassure others so they can know that they are not alone.
From here, God guided me to write that book He wanted me to do all those years ago.
Other plans of His for my life also came to light and Mindful of Christ Ministries has grown, according to God’s plans and purpose, not my own.
Now, through this journey and process and His amazing healing I can go out (literally!) and help others recognize and overcome limiting beliefs, negative thoughts and toxic emotions, grow in their relationship with God and themselves, and help them to discover and step into their God given purpose.
Are you ready to take that journey from pain into your purpose?
Related reading: 5 Ways to Find Hope in Your Hardship
The Comments
Adonai Shalom
Thank you for sharing your story and your struggles. Praise be to the LORD that you know Him and that He has helped you through this. I will be praying for you!