It Has Nothing to Do With Me At All

Yet again, I’ve been ignored.

There I was, in a room full of people, and all I could focus on was the one person who wasn’t talking to me.

Honestly, I don’t think anyone else even noticed, but I sure did. And it hurt my feelings because it wasn’t the first time.

My husband and I were driving home later that day when I unloaded my feelings. They poured out of me slowly at first but quickly picked up momentum.

Before long, I was saying things that I’m not proud of.

Then I got home, started a bit of mindless scrolling, and ran across Romans 12:14 where I was reminded to “Bless them which persecute you: bless, and curse not.”

It obviously was not random.

This verse is telling me how to treat these people: the ones who are rude, who choose others over me, who scream at me with their silence.

So, how do I bless them?

I can bless them by speaking kindly to them when I see them.

I can bless them by speaking kindly to others about them.

And, most importantly of all, I can bless them by speaking to my Father in a kind way about them.

I’m the only one who can control how I obey God and how I treat others.

Christian Response to Hurt: By Changing My Heart Toward Others, God Points Me Back to Him

As I’ve walked through these challenging times, God always checks my attitude first (cue Romans 12:14) and then shows me what He wants to change in me.

You see, God loves me so much that He doesn’t want me to stay in a place of bitterness.

Starting in the first book of the Bible, we can clearly see how bitterness leads to destruction. In Genesis 4, we read about Cain’s jealousy toward his brother Abel’s offering.

This jealousy consumed him. In the 6th verse, God Himself talks to Cain about it. We all know that he didn’t listen to the Lord, and, in the 8th verse, Cain actually killed his brother Abel.

Cain heard from the Lord and still let bitterness control him.

When God speaks to me, like He did through Romans 12:14, I too have free will. I can choose to listen and obey or continue to stew in my hurt feelings.

When we get to the 13th verse of Genesis, we see how distraught Cain is and how he eventually went away from the presence of the Lord.

Whatever jealousy he felt in the beginning could not have compared to the pain he felt at the end when he was separated from God.

God Wants What’s Best for Me and What’s Best for Me Includes Being Like Him

God blessed Abel as a keeper of sheep and Cain as a tiller of the ground according to Genesis 4:2. Both brothers simply had to bring their absolute best offerings to the Lord.

Abel did this the right way. Apparently, Cain did not. Yet still God gave him another chance in the 7th verse when He told Cain his offering would be accepted if given the correct way.

I don’t have an offering of sheep or grain to place before the Lord. We just don’t do it that way anymore. But my attitude toward others, even those who so clearly put me in my place, can be an offering to Him.

When I give my best to others, and therefore to the Lord, I’m the first one to change. I become more like Him, which is the point God is trying to teach me.

This pain I’ve endured through this trial has been used by God to teach me a valuable lesson: It has nothing to do with me at all. This life is all about what Jesus taught me in John 13:34-” Love one another as I have loved you.”

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